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Living Without The One You Cannot Live Without #Giveaway

29Apr | 2014

posted by Paula

Many of my regular readers over at thriftymommastips.com know this past year has been a hard one. Right before Mother’s Day one year ago my Mom passed away. The loss of a parent is much harder than I could have ever imagined. It is fraught with little emotional land mines you sometimes don’t see until you are crying or heartsick.

Recently a publishing contact sent me this book Living Without the One You Can’t Live With Out: Hope and Healing After Loss. I assumed the book would be self help, but it is a different creature entirely. Living Without the One You Can’t Live Without is a subtle, quiet, realistic book of poems by a lovely remarkable woman named Natasha Josefowitz. Josefowitz published this shortly after her husband of many years passed away. They were married 35 years. Josefowitz was born in Paris to Russian parents. She earned her Master’s degree at 40 and her PHD at 50. That alone is reason to support this author. What a brilliant career feat! She taught the first course in the US on women and management in 1976. She is remarkably accomplished, and much of that achievement came later in life. I liked her even before I picked the book up and began reading.

The poetry within Living Without the One You Can’t Live Without is sombre, and realistic and dripping with emotion. It takes you into the doctor’s offices and the recovery spaces at home, then it whisks you off to the funeral, the days and months after when survival is your operating mode. This is a lovely book, simple and true. The poems aren’t forced or rhyming. They are lyrical at times and not at others. They are mostly helpful for anyone who has experienced loss. The poems are sometimes hard to read in a psychological sense, but they speak clearly to the experience of grief. I really like this book and I am struggling to find the words to tell you why exactly, which is odd for me. But I want to say that there is comfort in common experience and this is the place where Living Without the One You Cannot Live Without excels and dwells. It will not take away grief or pain, and it will not preach how to grieve at you, instead Josefowitz’s words will help you feel less alone and there is much to be said for that.

I have a copy of this book to give to one of my readers. Follow the instructions below and PLEASE don’t forget to leave me an email address or something to help me track you down if you win. Good Luck! This is open to Canada and the US.

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Filed Under: books, giveaways, literature, loss, poems, reading, seniors

The Secret Ingredient – Review #books

30Jul | 2013

posted by Paula

I’ve always been a fan of a metaphor done well and although food metaphors can be overdone I just can’t help but think The Secret Ingredient is a palate cleansing kind of novel.
En route to Chicago for a blogging conference I dove into a new release from Delacorte Press by a random author I’d never heard of before. The Secret Ingredient was one of the numerous books in a surprise package sent to me by Random House a couple weeks ago. Now, getting a box full of 17 books right after your birthday, for a reader like me was the best gift ever. But by the same token getting 17 books that all look interesting is a challenge too. Which one should I choose first? 
Several of the new releases and advanced reader’s copies I received are young adult fiction. My daughter is 12 and she is a voracious reader, so I wondered if The Secret Ingredient by Stewart Lewis would be appropriate for her yet. I cracked the spine of The Secret Ingredient on the Amtrak train from Port Huron to Chicago and had it finished within four hours of the ride. The Secret Ingredient is a page-turner with a compelling plot about a young woman with two Dads (if you follow my blog thriftymommastips.com you can see why that hooked me right there, can’t you?) Olivia is a mature sixteen-year-old chef starting to wonder about her birth mother. Her Dads are both artistic and they run a restaurant in Los Angeles where Olivia cooks the specials most days. Her brother is also adopted and a wee bit of a flake with too many get rich quick schemes, an entrepreneurial spirit and musical talent to boot. Jeremy, unlike Olivia, has no inkling or desire to seek out his biological parents. 
Olivia is quite simply magnificent in her realism. Lewis breathes her onto the page effortlessly where she exists every bit as real as some of the most memorable characters from literary classics. I enjoyed this character completely, from start to finish, as she moved through her unique experience of the teenage years with eyes of an adoptee seeking to figure out various facets of her identity. Adoption plots somehow always seem to find me and this is an endless source of amusement here as I rarely pick up a book seeking to read about adoption anymore. Here adoption is a sub-plot woven consistently and evenly throughout. There is little drama and very little TV sensationalization here, which I fully appreciate. The Secret Ingredient is just a metaphor for the recipe of her life, her character and personality. Olivia wonders in a very realistic manner where her cooking talent comes from. It is her one gift not shared with anyone else in her family. She recalls all the various moments throughout school where her differences are called into question causing her to contemplate her history as an adoptee. She frames her experience against her brother’s and asks often if he ever cares to wonder where his biological parents might be. But Jeremy doesn’t seem to have a curious bone in his body.
Olivia’s two Dads are at a cross roads also, with their livelihood in jeopardy and bankruptcy imminent. Olivia’s best friend complains about her health nut of a mother until she realizes her mother has been covering an illness with a healthy eating and fitness obsession.  
The Secret Ingredient was a light, entertaining, and very well written, young adult book for the ages 14 plus. There is mild sexual activity within that I wouldn’t want my kids reading about yet. But I will shelve this one and keep it for my oldest daughter to read in a couple of years because the main character is so well done. 
I highly recommend this summer read for anyone 14 plus, especially appealing to those who have any experience of adoption or foster care. $$$$$ out of $$$$$.

The Secret Ingredient is fiction, published June 2013, 256 pages, by Stewart Lewis, $19.99 Trade Paperback in Canada. 

Filed Under: adoption, authors, books, fiction, food, literature, reviews, young adult

The Weird Sisters

26Apr | 2011

posted by Paula

The Weird Sisters, by Eleanor Brown is a clever indulgence of a book, a bittersweet treat that will appeal to those who love literary fiction, or a passion for Shakespeare. The Weird Sisters is the story of three sisters, Rose, Bean and Cordy, or, when read as a contemporary and smart adaptation of King Lear, Rosalind, Bianca and Cordelia. Lear, in this telling of the story, is a professor at the University of Barnwell, a big fish inside a rather small bowl. He lives his life entirely in plays and books and recites bits of dialogue where conversation should be, and that makes life with this patriarch challenging and awkward. In current vernacular he might have been diagnosed with something akin to Asperger’s disorder or giftedness. He possesses brilliance and he is a remarkably loyal husband to an equally brilliant and scatter-brained wife, but he also is socially inept. Imagine being raised as the child of two parents such as these. Minds on fire all the time and yet often unable to stop thinking long enough to perform the most basic of domestic tasks required to raise a house full of girls. And so naturally the eldest of the girls, Rose has become the motherly figure, organizing everyone’s lives. As her fiancee has accepted a teaching position abroad for a time in England, Rose is adrift, back home again, not really by choice, but mostly due to the fact she cannot make up her mind if she truly wants to get married. As the story begins, there are three sisters, each returning home austensibly to help their mother battle breast cancer. But as the plot unfolds, it is revealed that each sister has their own reason for returning home. Each has failed in their attempts to live outside this tiny community on their own. Bianca, Bean, is home because she has lost a job, having stolen funds to keep herself living in the New York fashion she is accustomed to. Her clothing, material goods and lifestyle of flirting and disposing of men has caught up with her legally, and her age has also begun to interfere. In a particularly poignant scene Bean, desparate to prove her worth by seducing a man, heads to the Barnwell poolhall and finds a sad group of men on the prowl. Despite her self and her reservations, she pulls out all the stops trying to seduce them, men she wouldn’t even begint o look at twice in New York, and yet here she must settle. As she is honing in for the kill, a group of young women enter the bar and the lovely Bianca is tossed aside, like last night’s leftovers. “What did this mean for her? What do you do when you are no longer the one worth watching? When there are women less beautiful, less intelligent, less versed in the art of the game who nonetheless can beat you at it simply because of their birth date?” Rosalind, Rose, is the homebody, the eldest daughter, faithful and loyal to her family, but a brilliant mind in her own right, unable to realize her full potential, unable too to move on to England where her fiancee has accepted a job as a professor. She is the martyr of the trio. Will she be able to rise above that stereotypical role in time to save herself? Cordelia, Cordy is the baby of the group, an overgrown Hippy roady, allowing the winds to blow her about, never finding anchor until she is forced to re-examine her lifestyle due to an unexpected pregnancy. 
Each of the three sisters has a complicated relationship within the family. As the narrator puts it in the start of the book. “See we love each other, we just don’t happen to love each other very much.” They are each a great deal more like their parents than they think they are, and therefore everyone exists slightly socially awkward in the world and much too reliant on the plots and words that they have read and internalized. As their mother prepares for a mastectomy, the narrator says: “Another family might have made preparations. Another mother might have cooked casseroles in Corningware and frozen them, labeled with instructions.” Instead to the hospital each of the sisters brings with her, a book in which they will escape and avoid having to confront real life. “Instead, we would do what we always did, the only thing we’d ever been depebndably stellar at: we’d read.”
In some ways this book is also a charming look at a marriage that is quite remarkable. There are glimpses here that illustrate how interconnected husband and wife are, growing even more intertwined as they are challenged by cancer. There is a comical aside here by the sisters, noting the irony of the fact that so much literature is written on the impact of divorce and none written about the equally onerous impact of a marriage that is epic in strength and duration. How, states one of the sisters, could we ever be expected to find for ourselves a love that is so great? The Weird Sisters is a charming literary coming of age story and a savvy retelling of Shakespeare. It is a dark look at the relationships within a family and the many ways in which family can often simultaneously support, nurture and hurt each other the most.

The Weird Sisters, by Eleanor Brown, Feb. 2011, Putnam Books, Penguin Group Canada, 336 pages, $24.95 US or $31.00 Canadian.

Thriftymommastips rating is $$$$ out of $$$$$.

I received a copy of this book in order to facilitate the review. This in no way impacts or alters  my opinion.

Filed Under: authors, cancer, fiction, King Lear, literature, reading, relationships, reviews, Shakespeare, sisters

Red In The Flower Bed: An Interracial Adoption Story and Blog Tour

1Dec | 2010

posted by Paula

Red In The Flower Bed is a sweet, imaginative and yet simple twist on a child’s adoption story. I am an adoptive parent of two children, an adoption advocate, speaker and writer and our home library is more than full of books that are for all ages and stages of the adoption journey. But, this one had a new twist I’d not yet seen which is why I recommend it. Andrea Nepa has taken a seed as a metaphor and while that might seem logical and simplistic, I haven’t actually seen it used in this manner. The seed is a lovely metaphor for an adopted child. While this book specifically tackles interracial adoption, I felt it missed the marketing mark here and limited itself. If you look at this as a story of any adoptee, it makes sense and appeals to a wider audience in my opinion. The child is like the seed of a poppy here, blowing in the wind, carried to a different pasture. The pasture is an obvious reference to the family created by adoption. This story is aimed at 3 to 6 year olds and is reliant on rhyme and cute cutout style pictures. “So there among the violet, rose and marigold the little black dot settled into her spot.”  What a surprise she will be when she blooms and is a bright red poppy in a field of predictable colours. Red In the Flower Bed is a nice addition to anyone’s adoption library. It is a gentle, sensitive story. Red in The Flower Bed is a nice alternative to the many animal metaphors and characters that are often used to explore themes of differences and adoption in children’s fiction. This story is clever and a good way to work the topic of adoption onto your bookshelf and into your child’s life.

Red In the Flower Bed is by Andrea Nepa, published by Tribute Books, December 2008 in the United States, retails for $11.65, also available as an ebook for Kindle.

The opinions in this blog are all my own. I received a copy of this book to read for review.

Filed Under: adoption, children, children's books, children's picture books, crime fiction, literature, race, simple stories

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About Paula


Keeper of the Sanity - Freelance journalist, social media consultant and community manager. I build buzz for you. #KelloggersNetwork. Twitter Party junkie. Published in magazines, newspapers, on TV, radio etc.

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